. . .everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." - Ian MacLaren
I know it's been a bit since I last posted. Much of that is because I needed to go home and disconnect. But a lot has been bouncing around in my brain and I didn't want to share it until I had time to ruminate a little. I read the above quote a while back but for some reason, all last week it was plastered to the forefront of my mind like a neon sign. Another of my favorite quotes which is exceedingly similar to the one above is from the 1950 movie, "Harvey." The main character, Elwood, cites some wisdom from his mother who used to tell him, "In this world, Elwood, you must be oh so smart or oh so pleasant" to which Elwood adds, "Well, for years I was smart. I recommend pleasant." It's a great movie.
We get so caught up in the push and pull of daily life - we compete to be recognized among our peers, we compete through petty one-upmanship, we even compete for the best parking spot. I'm not at all immune. Several days ago, one of my favorite bloggers, Rachel Held Evans, mentioned in a response to a comment that she often had trouble keeping "a teachable spirit." When I read that, I had to sit back in my chair and take a breath. I love to learn, but I'm not always receptive to what I NEED to learn.
One of the lessons that was hardest and took the longest for me was the one to learn humility without self-loathing. It's a lesson I struggle with daily. (Last quote, I promise!) C.S. Lewis said, "Humility is not thinking less of yourself but thinking of yourself less." Humility is at the heart of kindness. We stop thinking of ourselves and we begin to take others into consideration. Selflessness is not just about volunteering or opening doors for people. It's not just about having empathy for those less fortunate than you. It's also about just being kind to people. We beg for the same forgiveness that we so often refuse to our own friends. They make mistakes or say something they don't actually mean, and we jump on the instant to prove them wrong. Most importantly, we want to prove we're right. There's no fail-safe way to learn which battles to fight and which to humbly bow out of. But remember, "everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
Some of us are close to victory in our current battles and some of us are hopelessly lost in the trenches of doubt and fear. Some people feel a lot better about their chances of winning than others. Without a doubt, we all end up sticking our feet in our mouths and accidentally saying the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time. Again, this is a specialty of mine. However, I try to overcome my own burning need to be right by reminding myself that everyone - my classmates, my friends, my co-workers, that person I avoid in Walmart - everyone is fighting a hard battle.
That said, be kind to each creature.
- Noelle
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Thursday, January 24, 2013
Polka-Dotted Goats and Cotton Candy Hover Crafts
Hey, I had to title it something that would make you read this, right? So listen, this week...I think the word "meh" intimates the best approximation of what this week has been. Yesterday in particular was one of those days where one thing goes kind of the opposite to your plans and then for the rest of the day you feel completely inadequate and pray for Jesus to make you invisible whilst you duck under your steering wheel because you didn't see the ONE WAY sign...twice. But I digress.
Instead of posting anything thought-provoking (although I promise something awesome is coming soon), I'm going to post some stuff that makes me feel better. This first one is a clip from the Muppets of a short-lived character named Don Music. I feel like Mr. Music on a daily basis.
And here is a picture of Harpo Marx, the second-oldest of the famous Marx Brothers, with Amelia Earhart. Y'all, Amelia Earhart has been my hero since grade school. I did a report on her in 3rd or 4th grade and since then I have been enchanted by her beauty, grace, spirit, and courage. This is a picture so full of awesome that one must sit and just marinate in it. Here you go. And you're welcome.
(Shout out to http://awesomepeoplehangingouttogether.tumblr.com/)
That's all I got today, my friends. Be kind to each creature,
Noelle
Instead of posting anything thought-provoking (although I promise something awesome is coming soon), I'm going to post some stuff that makes me feel better. This first one is a clip from the Muppets of a short-lived character named Don Music. I feel like Mr. Music on a daily basis.
And here is a picture of Harpo Marx, the second-oldest of the famous Marx Brothers, with Amelia Earhart. Y'all, Amelia Earhart has been my hero since grade school. I did a report on her in 3rd or 4th grade and since then I have been enchanted by her beauty, grace, spirit, and courage. This is a picture so full of awesome that one must sit and just marinate in it. Here you go. And you're welcome.
(Shout out to http://awesomepeoplehangingouttogether.tumblr.com/)
That's all I got today, my friends. Be kind to each creature,
Noelle
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
You Betta Believe It
As I'm writing, one of our betta fish (thus, the awful pun that is the title of this post) is shooting across his bowl at high enough speeds for me to hear him. I'm sitting about 12 feet away. Little guy is booking it. And what does he find on the other side of the bowl? Nothing. There's not glimpse of disappointment or confusion. Just a launching spurt of energy, a small splash, and a quick turnaround. What I see in this fish right now is a whole lot of myself.
Maybe he was feeling confined and thought that his best chances of escape were these flailing bursts that turn him into a little fish-bullet. I've been there. My roommate has to constantly reconstruct my undergrad experience for me because I shot through so much of it that I really can't remember what happened when. I finished in the traditional 4 years, but within those years I had the most substantial of my life experiences against a kaleidoscopic backdrop of student organizations, jobs, academic commitments, and personal growth. Much of it was involuntary and totally out of my control. But a lot of it was also my attempt to push out of where I was - mentally, emotionally, and spiritually - in desperate bursts very much like our little bowl-bound friend. I wasn't unhappy or running from anything necessarily, I just felt the overwhelming freedom that most newly released creatures feel when the cage door of adolescence shoots up. So, instead of wild parties, passionate love affairs, or Lifetime-worthy drama, I jumped head first into the waves of more savory endeavors. I waded into the waters of student leadership, social clubs, campus ministries, and academic involvement. By the fall semester of my senior year, I was involved in half a dozen organizations, taking 22 hours of classes (where's a time-turner when you need one?), and working 2 jobs. Wading turned into swimming. Swimming turned into snorkeling. Snorkeling turned into deep-sea, no-tank diving in the San Andreas Fault. I was engulfed.
There was a point during which I spent most of my spare time apologizing for sending an assignment to the right professor but for the wrong class or for being late to one meeting or another. But like any challenging time, I learned more than I ever had before, and not just in class. Actually, I learned the most outside of class. I attended a small, public, liberal arts college. There was a ton of overlap in my daily life. I often tell my friends from larger colleges, if you did anything at my undergrad, you did everything at my undergrad. They should award degrees for plate-spinning. Now that I look at the bowl, our little sea sprinter is resting calmly on his decorative glass stones. Not just because he's just plum tuckered out (proof I'm from the South), but because it necessary. I had to take time to just be. In these times of quiet, I sat under trees and talked with those closest to me. We forged relationships in laughter, sadness, joy, and quiet. Often at 2 in the morning buy, hey, you take what you can get.
I'm in a very different season of my life now compared to where I was this time last year. I'm not rushing headlong into the waters of May, praying to survive student teaching. I'm not rushing anywhere. I'm less involved, or maybe just involved in less, than I have been in the past 4 years. It's doesn't feel natural at all and I'm hoping to find at least some puddles to splash around in this semester. But compared to the fleeting torpedo that my life was in my undergrad years, I look a lot more like a grad school jellyfish now (metaphorically speaking, of course). That's not to say I'm not busy. I definitely am. But I am no longer in a fish bowl of opportunities just begging for me to jump in. There are many doors open before me now, but I can't choose them all. It's very different and I am adjusting. My Creator is preparing me, I think. What for, I'm not yet sure. But there is something in the works and so I am just putting one paw in front of the other until I get where I'm going.
I'd like to end some of my posts with questions because other folks do that and other folks are better at what they do than I am. Where are you in your life now? Are you torpedoing through your fish bowl or floating in a clear current? Maybe you're somewhere in the middle like me? I'd love to hear about it.
Be kind to each creature,
Noelle
Maybe he was feeling confined and thought that his best chances of escape were these flailing bursts that turn him into a little fish-bullet. I've been there. My roommate has to constantly reconstruct my undergrad experience for me because I shot through so much of it that I really can't remember what happened when. I finished in the traditional 4 years, but within those years I had the most substantial of my life experiences against a kaleidoscopic backdrop of student organizations, jobs, academic commitments, and personal growth. Much of it was involuntary and totally out of my control. But a lot of it was also my attempt to push out of where I was - mentally, emotionally, and spiritually - in desperate bursts very much like our little bowl-bound friend. I wasn't unhappy or running from anything necessarily, I just felt the overwhelming freedom that most newly released creatures feel when the cage door of adolescence shoots up. So, instead of wild parties, passionate love affairs, or Lifetime-worthy drama, I jumped head first into the waves of more savory endeavors. I waded into the waters of student leadership, social clubs, campus ministries, and academic involvement. By the fall semester of my senior year, I was involved in half a dozen organizations, taking 22 hours of classes (where's a time-turner when you need one?), and working 2 jobs. Wading turned into swimming. Swimming turned into snorkeling. Snorkeling turned into deep-sea, no-tank diving in the San Andreas Fault. I was engulfed.
There was a point during which I spent most of my spare time apologizing for sending an assignment to the right professor but for the wrong class or for being late to one meeting or another. But like any challenging time, I learned more than I ever had before, and not just in class. Actually, I learned the most outside of class. I attended a small, public, liberal arts college. There was a ton of overlap in my daily life. I often tell my friends from larger colleges, if you did anything at my undergrad, you did everything at my undergrad. They should award degrees for plate-spinning. Now that I look at the bowl, our little sea sprinter is resting calmly on his decorative glass stones. Not just because he's just plum tuckered out (proof I'm from the South), but because it necessary. I had to take time to just be. In these times of quiet, I sat under trees and talked with those closest to me. We forged relationships in laughter, sadness, joy, and quiet. Often at 2 in the morning buy, hey, you take what you can get.
I'm in a very different season of my life now compared to where I was this time last year. I'm not rushing headlong into the waters of May, praying to survive student teaching. I'm not rushing anywhere. I'm less involved, or maybe just involved in less, than I have been in the past 4 years. It's doesn't feel natural at all and I'm hoping to find at least some puddles to splash around in this semester. But compared to the fleeting torpedo that my life was in my undergrad years, I look a lot more like a grad school jellyfish now (metaphorically speaking, of course). That's not to say I'm not busy. I definitely am. But I am no longer in a fish bowl of opportunities just begging for me to jump in. There are many doors open before me now, but I can't choose them all. It's very different and I am adjusting. My Creator is preparing me, I think. What for, I'm not yet sure. But there is something in the works and so I am just putting one paw in front of the other until I get where I'm going.
I'd like to end some of my posts with questions because other folks do that and other folks are better at what they do than I am. Where are you in your life now? Are you torpedoing through your fish bowl or floating in a clear current? Maybe you're somewhere in the middle like me? I'd love to hear about it.
Be kind to each creature,
Noelle
Monday, January 21, 2013
Meet the Creature
Hello, internet! I suppose that this is where I introduce myself. I'll try to repress the awkwardness here but let's be honest, that's not going to happen. I'll start with the facts:
- My name is Noelle
- I'm a graduate student in Mississippi (my home state) and...
- You're probably already bored
Well, if you've made it this far, I grant you my undying gratitude...and my first born. I prefer to take in information that is clearly organized so I'm going to break the rest down into sub-sections of equal caliber to the post thus far. You can hardly wait; I know.
Why the Title
My favorite 'name' for God is Creator. And my favorite way to imagine myself is as a creation. However, as humans we are often tethered to our 'creature' side. We hunger, we lust, we envy, we fear. The 'creature' keeps our bodies alive; the 'creation' seeks the divine. (The basis of all this comes from a book titled Christian Doctrine by Shirley C. Guthrie. I haven't finished reading it, but I highly recommend it.) I'm not suggesting that everything is one or the other. Or that God doesn't want us to answer the call of our growling stomachs. Instead, I want to talk about the in-between. That space in which I find myself most often. Yes, answer the hunger. No, don't eat an entire box of snack cakes. (This may or may not have happened before.) As a creature/creation, I strive to overcome my harmful creature instincts so that I can better glorify and thank my Creator. Along with all that, I also consider myself a fairly creative spirit. I write poetry and make up songs and have done so for most of my life. Music is always playing in my head. And so, here we are. I'm not naturally predisposed toward divulgence so I'm funneling my creative tendencies into this blog.
The Goal of This Blog
Honestly, there isn't one. I don't know a lot, but experience has taught me that sharing our stories helps us learn as much about ourselves as it does others. I'm certain I'll get something out of this. Perspective, hopefully. If you gain something as well, then I'll consider it a great blessing of which I have no ownership. Here's what I can promise:
- This blog will never be used in the spirit of passive-aggression, hatred, or humiliation nor will it have patience for those who seek to espouse such vitriol.
- Honesty is job #1. With that in mind, dear reader, please allow me the grace of the occasional misstep. I do not claim to speak for anyone else besides myself. I will be as tactful as I can be. Please, keep me in check if I go astray, but let's all agree to follow the Golden Rule.
- I will attempt to make you laugh at least once a week. I can't promise you'll actually laugh, but I can at least promise to try, right?
The Set-Up
To the left is a little about me. To the right are a few sites I go to daily. I'll post more as I find more. I don't foresee myself taking part in any sort of recurring theme days like "Movie Quote Mondays" or "Things That Make You Wish It Was Friday Thursdays," but I am totally open to wherever this thing goes. I'm also open to suggestions so if you want to know my thoughts on something, ask away! Reader Beware: You may release a mental Kraken, but fear not, it's a friendly Kraken.
And that's pretty much all there is to know! I will make every effort to post as often as I can. I am excited about the possibilities of this project and I look forward to sharing in some conversations with you all. Until next time, my friends!
Be kind to each creature,
Noelle
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